GOON:30: Currumbin Wildlife Sanctuary Day

Cards of Humanity was a fun way to kick off the night after me and Mushus’ verrrryyy long day at the Currumbin Wildlife Sanctuary. A couple glasses of Goon and complete exhaustion definitely makes you feel a bit more drunk and delirious than usual. Trying to understand an Australian text when you’ve been drinking is like trying to encrypt an ancient language. It takes us 4 girls (2 of them blonde, if you catch my drift) to break down one, 2 phrased text. Using ‘but’ at the end of a sentence and what are ‘use’ doing tonight is just not proper English. Speaking of drinking, Tiff, Worsty and Meesh all ‘trolled’ the other night because they couldn’t make a single cup in beer pong, like really? Oh and Mushu, by trolled I don’t mean rolled…hehe… Back to our eventful day, Meesh and I strolled around the sanctuary holding koalas, feeding/harassing a couple a’ roos and groping emus. One emu scared us at first with its devilish eyes and disgusting bed of fur but we were reassured by a 10 year old boy not to be afraid because this specific emu was ”the nicest emu in all of the world.” I’m not sure what they’re feeding some of these kangaroos but they could straight fuck your day up; it looked as though half of them were roided out. Although the Tasmanian Devil decided not to come out and play, which might have been a good thing since they can bite through skulls, we got to see wallabies, dingos, crocs, flying squirrels and tree kangaroos. What we didn’t get to see is the “amazing” magic show that we found out was cancelled after we had walked across the entire park to find an empty outdoor emporium. At this point were about 2 hours in with 5 hours to go, so naturally we sit down and take our time to eat. An order of fish and chips, chicken nugs, 2 coffees, a croissant and an ice cream later we decide to try out the ropes course. Even though I’m feeling a bit faint from the nauseating smells and 90 degree heat, we hop into our super cute jump suits which only made us even more sweaty and beautiful, and are on our way gliding through the trees on 2 foot long zip lines and walking across metal tight ropes 3 feet off the ground; pretty scary stuff. We decide to quit dis shit after the first course and head back to our favorite spot in the park, the café. The bus picks us at around 4:30 and we finally head back to the Village, only to make more food aka sausage sandies. Don’t get me wrong, we had a blast, it was just a long day of actually having to do something productive !!